Gifts

Last Friday God gave me a gift (you might recall from the November 9th post). I kept it secret for fear of jumping to conclusions. For the past 3 years i have had chronic pain, which is continuous pain every moment of every day.

Friday evening i had NONE. I fell asleep with little trouble and did not wake once in the middle of the night.

Saturday i had NONE. I have been doing dance physical therapy which has consisted of light ballet at the barre. Saturday i danced (and i mean DANCED - was listening to Linkin Park if that gives you a better idea) and afterward had no pain!

Sunday i had NONE. I picked up my pastor's two year-old son when he began to cry and although i am weaker than i used to be, i had no pain.

Monday i had N....
I walked up to campus without Miss Bluebell (my scooter) taking the stairs and walking in between classes with no pain. Just a little fatigue that might have been from the cold i had - yes, no pain but i had a nasty cold. I wondered what God had in store. Am i healed, is this a short break from suffering? That evening i got my answer. The neuropathy came back full force sending electric pain through my arms, legs, neck and eyes. Tuesday i had the worst headache to date accompanied with quick, sharp pains as if someone was stabbing a wire hanger in my eyes... no more wire hangers!!!
Okay sorry, anyway...

Three days without pain was such a blessing! Health is a gift. It reminds me of what Pastor Brian has been talking about on Sundays. We pray for what we want from God as if we are lord and He serves us. That is so backwards! He is Lord and we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:10). He blesses us everyday with food, clothing, shelter, friends, family, health and fellowship with Himself. If He has taken something from us, it is also for us to do a good work amidst adversity. We take for granted the things we are blessed with everyday that others may go without. Unfortunately, it is when God takes away that we realize what He had given.

Of course when God takes we can petition (an appeal or request, esp. a solemn or humble one to a deity or a superior) for relief. That is where we must go; to the cross asking for relief yet wanting first God's will to be done. Hand me the cup, Lord.

Last night at prayer meeting we read John 6:13- 21 - Jesus feeds the five thousand. It was an awesome reminder that by our own power nothing is possible - we do not have the resources. So we bring it to Christ to accomplish what we cannot. It is comforting to know that He will relieve the issue when He sees fit. It is a gift and a blessing to see how he brings us to our knees and how He answers our prayers.


12 Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.
Romans 12:12